Despite the pandemic turning our home and work lives upside-down for the past year, it has also provided us with a perspective that would have been hard to imagine in a pre-COVID-19 world. On my best, most optimistic days, I can see how the pandemic forced my family to slow down its increasingly frenetic schedule. It drove us outside more for bike rides, hikes, and backyard barbecues. It also made clear the things that are vital to our physical and mental health — and the things that made us ache to have to do without.

With somewhat of an end in sight (or at least a beginning of an end in sight), my husband, son, and I have been talking about what we want our lives to look like after . My 10-year-old has commented a few times about how strange it will be to go back to the way life was before, when we went into crowds with bare faces and our mere presence wasn’t a risk to our extended family.

But I suspect it won’t feel strange for very long. I wonder if, within months or even weeks, the lessons we are learning right now will fade away, disintegrating bit by bit, the way bad dreams tend to do. If we’ve had to live through this nightmare, though, I at least want to cling to its lessons.

Creating a family mission statement can help us prioritise what we’ve come to value during this time and guide our decision-making going forward. Where do we want to go, who do we want to see, what do we want to accomplish, and how do we want to treat others?

If you want to create a family mission statement, too, here are a few steps to get you going.

Call a brainstorming session

Sure, creating the mission statement — and then attempting to live by it — is the end goal, but getting the whole family together and involved in the brainstorming of it is equally as important as the final product. In order to really capture the essence of the entire family, everyone’s voice should be heard (assuming they’re old enough to participate).

Call an official family mission statement brainstorming session. Choose a time when everyone tends to be well-rested, well-fed, and not busy with work or school, such as a Saturday morning or late Sunday afternoon. To make it fun and tactile, pull out brainstorming paper and pencils for everyone, a white board with dry-erase markers, or colourful Post-it Notes for each person to jot down ideas. At the very least, everyone should be present and be given an opportunity to be heard.

Collect the ideas

Before you start tossing out ideas to include in the mission statement, explain why you want to create one and what you want it to accomplish. The statement should ultimately encapsulate your family’s core values and act as a guiding presence when making both big and small decisions.

Core family values might include social, moral, religious, work, or recreational ones. Some examples include generosity, honesty, respect, teamwork, patience, and togetherness. If you’re not sure where to begin, this list of family values from LoveToKnow will provide a good jumpstart.

It’s also helpful to get everyone brainstorming by asking some conversation-starting questions, such as these, from the Leader in Me organisation :

1. What is the purpose of our family?

2. What kinds of things do we want to do?

3. What kind of feeling do we want to have in our home?

4. What kind of relationships do we want to have with one another?

5. What are our family’s priorities?

6. What are our responsibilities as family members?

7. How can we contribute to society as a family and become more service-oriented?

Write your mission statement

As everyone in the family brainstorms the values important to them, it’s great to look for recurring themes — but also keep in mind that there are no right or wrong answers here. While honesty might be most important to one person, generosity might be at the top of someone else’s list. One family member might value celebrating each other’s successes while another values being open-minded to trying new things.

You don’t have to narrow it down to just one value — or even a few values. Everyone in the family should feel represented within the final mission statement. When your brainstorming session is complete, the parent or parents can start to draft the statement itself, with input from the kids. Once everyone is satisfied with the final copy, post it someplace where everyone can see it, such as the refrigerator or on a dry-erase board or decorative chalkboard.

Remember that this statement is not set in stone. The values we prioritise change over time, so make it a practice to revisit the mission statement once a year (or whenever it feels right) to see if there are any adjustments you’d like to make.

The post Why You Need a Family Mission Statement appeared first on Lifehacker Australia .

When the pandemic first hit and locked us in our homes, many of us were struck by the same bolt of inspiration (after we bought our toilet paper): We decided to bake bread. All that kneading, rising, and conjuring of the fresh bread smell in our homes was a thing we could focus on when life outside our front door felt too scary to navigate. Cooking and baking are good life skills to learn, but they can also serve to soothe and entertain when we need soothing and entertaining — which is why we should also share the experience with our kids.

Pulling out the flour and sugar to whip up some muffins with them is great. But we’ve all had a long year, so if what you really want is to curl up on the couch and watch someone else pull out the flour and sugar, your kids are probably going to be game for that, too. There some great cooking and baking shows out there for kids and families right now — and here are my favourites.

The Great British Baking Show

There will be many shows on this list that are specifically geared toward kids or feature kid contestants. This is not that show, but I’m starting here anyway, because The Great British Baking Show is some truly wholesome, wonderful, heartwarming programming.

We blew through its most recent full season (season 11) quickly in my home because it had everything we needed: contestants who were encouraging of each other, funny banter between hosts, and a slew of desserts with names we’d never even heard of. (Care for a slice of Battenberg, anyone?)

(There is also a Junior Bake Off , but the British are mostly keeping it to themselves for the moment, unless you have a streaming VPN that will help you bypass their geo-restrictions .)

Streaming on Netflix

Nailed It!

Nailed It! is fun for kids because it’s all about adults (home chefs) competing against each other to recreate culinary masterpieces and largely…failing miserably. It helps to dispel a bit of the social media perfectionism we all experience (one person’s winking emoji cookie is another person’s wild-eyed disaster).

It’s an endearing show because it’s a little bit of a hot mess (in a friendly, goofy, whimsical way), and we’re all a little bit of a hot mess right now.

Streaming on Netflix.

Nadiya’s Time to Eat

Does cooking sometimes feel like a chore? Oh hell yes, of course it does , and Nadiya has decided it’s time we all embrace the beauty of the shortcut — she’s all about dinnertime (and dessert-time) hacks, which is why we love her. As a bonus, since her recipes are so quick to make, she also has time to travel a bit and visit the places where ingredients are born, such as a mushroom producer, a salmon farm, and a Heinz factory.

Streaming on Netflix

Waffles + Mochi (With Michelle Obama)

I have to end not with a show that is already a favourite, but one I suspect will become a favourite. The former first lady, in keeping with her dedication to encourage kids to eat healthier, is launching a cooking show next month — with puppets. The Washington Post explains:

In addition to executive producing “Waffles + Mochi,” which debuts March 16, she’ll play the proprietor of a “whimsical supermarket” that employs the titular puppets, who are best friends and aspiring chefs. (One is an adorably small orb formed like the Japanese rice cake and the other a creature whose ears are shaped like the griddled breakfast treat.) “I’m excited for families and children everywhere to join us on our adventures as we discover, cook, and eat delicious food from all over the world,” she wrote in a tweet.

Streaming on Netflix starting March 16

Consider this list a starting point, as there are many other family-friendly cooking and baking shows out there worthy of a watch.

The post 4 Fun Shows to Get Your Kids Into Cooking appeared first on Lifehacker Australia .

There is no timeline yet for when a coronavirus vaccine will be deemed safe and available for kids under age 16. However, you should still be keeping them up with their regular wellness checks and immunisation schedules, even as we continue to work our way through this pandemic.

For some kids (and adults), even the thought of that needle can send them into a panic. They’re probably never going to love getting a shot, but you can help reduce some of their anxiety with a little preparation.

Prepare them

Springing a shot on a child, once they’re old enough to know what one is and they have shown some anxiety over it, is usually not a good idea. I didn’t offer up the information when my son was very little and largely unaware of what was happening; but by the time he was old enough to ask whether he was going to get a shot, I answered honestly.

It’s important to explain to kids in basic language why the shot is important (“It prevents you from getting certain diseases that could make you very sick”), acknowledge any anxiety they have about it (“It sounds like you’re feeling a little nervous; I’ll be right there with you the whole time”), and be honest about what they’ll experience. A shot does feel painful to some people, even if it’s just for a moment; to say they “won’t feel a thing” isn’t necessarily true and may make them feel like you lied to them. Instead, focus on the briefness of the discomfort: “It only hurts for a second, like a small pinch, and then it’s done.”

You may want to choose a relaxation technique or breathing exercise that you can do together when it’s time for them to receive the shot, such as counting down from three, singing a favourite song, or doing some deep breathing together. Don’t forget to vocalise whatever relaxation technique you’ve practiced to the doctor or nurse before they get ready to administer the shot. If you don’t, the doctor may give your child directions that are contrary to what you’ve practiced, which may be confusing for them.

It’s also worth noting that if they’re not displaying any worry over getting a shot, there’s no need for the extensive prep — that will only make them think maybe they do have something to worry about. Follow their lead on this.

Give them some control

Getting a vaccination can be anxiety-inducing, even for adults. And the central part of the experience — whether or not to actually get the shot — is not in their control. But there are lots of other choices you can let them make to help them feel like they’re directing the action, rather than have the action happen to them against their will. To start, before you leave home, ask them if there is a comfort item, such as a stuffed animal or favourite blanket, they’d like to bring with them to squeeze or provide a distraction.

When you go into the exam room, let them choose to sit in your lap or on their own. They can choose which arm gets the shot, and which Band-Aid will cover it up. (If you’re not sure whether their doctor will have a selection of Band-Aids, you could bring one from home and they can choose between yours and the doctor’s.) If you’re both getting a flu shot, ask if they’d like to watch you go first, and they can help you be brave. I’m not suggesting you flood them with an overwhelming number of choices, but letting them have a say in a couple of these things can ease a feeling of helplessness.

But perhaps most importantly: Remain calm yourself throughout the entire process. It can be heartbreaking to watch your child experience fear or pain, but they will feed, at least partially, off your own emotions. If you seem anxious, it is likely to make them even more nervous. Be encouraging throughout the experience and praise them afterward for being brave.

End with some kind of treat

There are different views on whether rewarding a child with treats is ever ok or always a terrible idea. I personally fall into the “I won’t bribe you to behave , but I will celebrate your bravery after you’ve done a hard thing” camp — and it takes bravery to get a shot when you’re scared of that needle.

Not all treats have to come with a cheap plastic toy or be covered in sprinkles. You could promise you’ll cue up their favourite movie when you get home or play their favourite game after dinner. Maybe you’ll swing by the playground after their appointment or you’ll add bubbles to their evening bath. You can focus your “treat” either on something they love to do or something that will comfort them.

The post How to Handle Your Kid’s Fear of Shots appeared first on Lifehacker Australia .

For small children, even the most basic tasks around the home can be a challenge. This is at least partly because homes are built to be used most efficiently by an average-sized adult — everything from the countertops and sinks to the toilets and doorknobs are placed at a height that best suits our comfort, which often means they’re too high for little kids to comfortably reach. In the case of a too-high hand towel rack, that can mean a towel is repeatedly pulled down, used, and then discarded in the sink or on the floor.

But when annoyance hit its peak, one parent in our Offspring Facebook group came up with a solution to that. Ashley and her husband, John, were — and I quote — “frustrated out of our minds with wet hand towels in the sink.” So John grabbed a hair tie, and a solution was born:

The trick here is to have one end of the towel hang down lower so that little hands are more inclined to dry themselves rather than yank to pull the towel down to their height. And if you’re afraid this method will result in a small child yanking the entire towel holder from the wall, Ashley tells our group :

Our hair tie is not very tight and we keep a small end so if pulled hard enough, it will just come undone. Every once in a while, I do have to pull it back up a bit. I suppose if you had a hair tie that was very tight, that might be a problem and [with] a motivated kid, you might have a dry wall repair on your hands. You know your kid(s); proceed with caution.

But, “you know your kids; proceed with caution,” is basically the line I should add at the end of every Lifehacker post.

The post Use a Hair Tie to Hang a Towel Your Kid Can Reach appeared first on Lifehacker Australia .

Many of us are feeling the impacts of a more sedentary life during the pandemic — and we’ve seen the way that nearly a year of staying home has impacted our kids’ fitness, too. From sports camps during the summer to gym class, gymnastics lessons, and team sports during the school year, our kids have had fewer opportunities to move in the ways they love.

As we begin to see a light at the end of the isolating tunnel, they may be feeling like it’s time to start moving again — and they may be looking for more targeted help than a few jogs around the block. They may want a personal trainer. If they are, here are some things to keep in mind.

Don’t suggest it yourself

Encouraging kids to stay active is great. Inviting them to join you for a walk or a hike is wonderful. Finding a physical activity you love doing together, such as skiing or shooting hoops in the driveway, is even better. Suggesting it’s time they hire a personal trainer — especially without any prompting from them — however, is likely to be insulting or embarrassing.

Nothing says, “I think you need to lose some weight,” like unsolicited advice about getting in shape. No good can come from that; however, if they come to you with the idea of getting a personal trainer, there are some things to keep in mind to help them decide whether it makes sense for them and what type of trainer to look for.

Discuss their goals

Before you say decide how — or whether — to move forward with hiring a personal trainer, you need to understand exactly what your teenager hopes to get out of it. If they were playing a particular sport before everything shut down and they are about to pick it back up again, they may be feeling like their body isn’t in the shape to jump right back in and may want a trainer who specifically knows what drills to run with them to get them back in the groove. If that’s the case, you might look into whether an experienced high school coach in your area does this type of training on the side, rather than a personal trainer at your local gym.

Another situation might be that they have decided they want to run their first 5K this autumn and would like to get in better shape as part of their training. Or they want to learn different exercises they can do at home as a break from the monotony of the treadmill. Or they’ve realised that regular exercise helps minimise their anxiety, so they’re looking to prioritise it by building in some consistency and accountability. These are all valid and understandable reasons for considering a personal trainer.

Be on the lookout, though, for any indications that the desire for a personal trainer stems from body image issues or disordered eating. While girls with eating disorders may be focused on losing weight or maintaining a low weight, a boy’s disordered eating often includes a desire to look lean and gain muscularity, which can lead to excessive exercising. Talk with them about their fitness goals so you can better understand what they hope to achieve through the process.

Consider a trainer for the whole family

Our teenagers probably are not the only ones who could benefit from a little extra movement. If you sense your teen wants to get on a more consistent exercise regimen but they seem embarrassed to take the next step — or if you’ve got younger kids that you’re struggling to keep engaged in physical activity — you might consider hiring a trainer for the whole family.

Look for personal trainers in your area who offer group packages — your whole family might as well be the group. Interview a couple of trainers (you can do this virtually to start) to find someone who would be a good fit to work with the different ages and fitness levels within your family. Your trainer might meet you once a week at a local park to run you through some stretching and warm-up exercises, and then set up relay races for you or coach you through a game of flag football. It doesn’t have to be all push-ups and running laps — look for someone who can make it fun for the whole family to get moving.

The post Does Your Teen Need a Personal Trainer? appeared first on Lifehacker Australia .

Our kids’ online lives can feel like a bit of a mystery. Particularly if they are into gaming, they might sit — headphones on and behind closed doors — for hours at a time, leaving you wondering who they’re interacting with and what those conversations are like. If that’s the case, one popular gamer has advice for parents: You should be listening in.

David Marchese recently talked with Tyler Blevins — more widely known as “Ninja,” a popular video game streamer among teenagers and young adults — for the New York Times . Blevins says he frequently encounters kids who say racist things or who are aggressive and threatening to women while he’s streaming.

It’d be great, Blevins says, if you could somehow track down those kids’ parents to let them know what kind of hurtful or inappropriate language their tweens or teens are using online — but that’s not possible, which means parents need to be vigilant about what their own kid is saying. As Blevins says :

It all comes down to parenting. You want to know who your kid is? Listen to him when he’s playing video games when he thinks you’re not. Here’s another thing: How does a white kid know he has white privilege if his parents never teach him or don’t talk about racism? If they’re gaming and their first interaction with racism is one of their friends saying the N-word and they have no idea what it is — what if it was on my stream? Is it my job to have this conversation with this kid? No, because the first thing that’s going on in my head is, This kid is doing this on purpose to troll me.

This is the inherent problem with the “just let kids be kids” and “talking about racism and sexism only further divides us” arguments. If we, as parents, don’t talk about these issues with our kids, society (particularly, their peers) will be waiting to do it for us. They may learn — and use — words they’ve never heard before in offensive ways without even realising the degree to which they are offensive, and they might not think to ask what a word or phrase means before they start adopting it into their own vernacular, hurting or offending others along the way. Not to mention they may be saying things that could lead to them being reported.

I’m not typically one to advocate for snooping into a child’s privacy (unless there’s a compelling safety reason to do so), but Blevins’ suggestion to keep an ear on your kid’s gaming talk is a good one. I’m not advising you pull up a chair and stick an ear to their bedroom door for an hour, but a brief listen now and then as you walk by might give you some insight into how they are communicating with gaming friends online and whether there are some conversations you need to have.

At the very least, it’s a good idea to check in with them now and then to ask about the gaming friends they’ve met online and what playing with those friends has been like. As long as you’re engaged and interested, your chances are better that they’ll open up to you about these interactions, which can help pave the way for productive conversations.

The post Listen to Your Kids While They’re Gaming appeared first on Lifehacker Australia .